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The Heist
Bona is sitting at the end of a very long table Everyone, the heist is simple. We're gonna fucking kill ourselves, go to heaven, and steal Jesus' shoes.
*A pink puffball jumps on the table sucking up all food* So....A heist correct? I'm your guy.....
Question! A pompadour clad man raises his hand. If we steal his shoes can I be his bud!?
Bona looks over to kirby You will be of great service my guy. He then turns to face Gentaro Yes my good sir. You can be our distraction. Once we kill ourselves and go to heaven, I will get into more details of what must go down.
Damn Right I will *Pulls out a UZI*
Who do I shoot first.....
Halt villains! I will not let you steal this man's shoes! A window breaks and in comes the Breakfast Warrior! Shouting at the top of his lungs and wielding his laser blade!
Not so fast fucker! *Sucks up PK and copies his persona powers*
PK yelps at the sudden sucking and gets eaten by Kirby, Upon copying his powers a pair of Jack Frosts lay beside Kirby, awaiting his command as PK crawls his way out of the pink chasm, What dastardly power! It's unfortunate that you can't tap into their magic! You have to fuse them to do magic! Like this! Come! Waffles! PK then cuts open a rift for his own Jack Frosts to fuse together, creating a golden knight with a spear
*Spits the moron out and shoots him point blank with the UZI laughing*
Bona pulls out some holy water and pours it on his accomplices and Pancake Knight There all are baptized. Time to get this shit started! He then proceeds to shoot all then himself the group appears in heaven We are here!
Gentaro shoots himself in the face, but not before saying some final words. If I don't wake up because Jesus is my bud, just put the big blue switch in my belt, and I'll be fine! I've died before!
*Shoots self and goes to heaven with them laughing holding a bazooka*
is ded, and unfortunately PK only believes in the Pancake god so he stays ded BAD ENDING
Alright gents, now that we are here we need someone to distract Jesus while we hop the fence. We will then sneak into Jesus's house and steal his shoes. Once we grab em, we high tail it outta here. Now Gentaro, distract our boi Jesus. Jesus leans on the side of the gates waiting for any new arrivals
Can I shoot some stuff?
OI JESUS! YOU AREN'T THE GOD THAT I KNOW! WANNA BE MY BUD THOUGH? Gentaro holds out his hand.
Gleamstar is here because yes. Oh hey, I guess I accidentally killed myself again. We raiding Heaven? Sweet.
And I'm doing this *Is headshotting angels*
Jesus looks at Gentaro Ah hello there my son. Jesus shakes his hand Now my son. I am all buds with everyone. So yes, I will be your bud. As long as you accept me as your lord and savior As Gentaro distracts Jesus Bona hops the fence That dumb sucker is gonna be distracted for a while. Lets get those shoes now. Bona starts walking into heaven
Gleamstar hops over the fence, loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
*Follows along sucking up an angel and getting angel powers and kills more*
ANGEL FACISM!
Gentaro does not accept Jesus. Listen pal, I know a guy who's WAY more godly than you! His name's Kota! He and I are buds, and I didn't even have to accept him!
The group reaches Jesus' house Alright gang. We need someone to pick this lock on Jesus' door. Or just someone to bust the window, either one works but we just need to get inside. Who knows how much longer Gentaro can keep Jesus busy.
God damnit *Sucks up Jesus getting his beard*
Gentaro does not accept Jesus. ooc: top 10 anime betrayals ic: Pulls out two handguns, somehow. I'm on it. She shoots the window and hops inside.
*Stabs something random*
Jesus is unnafected by the sucking or Kirby My son that is not good to do. He then looks to Gentaro a but confused my son, if you do not accept me. Then you must face...JUDGEMENT! Bona hops in with Gleamstar Alright we are in. Now to find those shoes.
*Uses the legendary sword galaxia I "Gotten" From meta Knight and fights Jesus in a badass lightsaber duel like sword Fight*
Alrighty. Lessee... She opens the closet. Lotsa white robes. Why so much white?
Gentaro tries to reach for his Fourze system, but instead summons the Ghost Driver, with the Fourze Eyecon! Henshin! [Kaigan: Fourze! Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep! Switch Oshita! Uchuuuuuuuuuuuuu Kitaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!]
Jesus whips out his Crossaber My son, you do not wish to do this. You will not win! Jesus uses the force of christianity to push back kirby and Gentaro My sons you better be ready to face judgement soon. He is coming Bona destroys a closet White is a common color in heaven. Its too bright, I do not like it. He then pulls out a shoe box from underneath Jesus bed We have found them!
*Uses a lethal ass gunblade*
HEAVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN KITAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA The camera pans out to reveal where heaven is, and it's actually Danny DeVito's apartment! The camera zooms back into Gentaro. Let's fight this man to deity!
*Calls in the Kirby brigade*
THE SQUEAK SQUAD HAS SOME ASS KICK AND BLOW BUBBLE GUM AND WERE ALL OUT OF GUM!
My sons you have brought this on yourselves Jesus puts a minature cross above his head TRANSFORM!!! A blinding light surrounds Jesus and when it disappears Jesus stands there with triangle sunglasses and cloth surrounding him. His crown of thorns is even bigger It is time to face your judgment my sons...Come at me!Jesus gets into a fighting stance Meanwhile at Jesus' house Bona tries on Jesus shoes Perfect fit. He then starts to walk but slips. Jesus' shoes were heelies I am taming the things that once killed me!
Gleamstar somehow dies in Heaven because I need sleep goodnight America
*The squeak squad opens fire with AK-47's*
Gentaro does a pose, and the Fourze driver appears! Not on my watch! [THREE! TWO! ONE!] It's SPACE TIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIME! [Cosmic! Cos- u- mic! ON!] Let's settle this one on one!
Jesus Ultimate Christ blocks the coming bullets My child, you are foolish to think bullets would harm me...now...[/] Jesus Ultimate Christ turns to Gentaro [u]Lets do this bud! Jesus Ultimate Christ charges at Gentaro with two Crossabers. He then jumps and starts twirling towards Gentaro Back at Jesus' house Bona contiues to try and heelie but keeps falling I will conquer you!
*Fires a missle made by Lucifer*
Gentaro draws his Barizun Sword, and pulls back the lever on it to block Jesus's Crossabers. I'll take you on with the power of the universe!
Jesus smirks while jumping backwards The power of Christianity is stronger than the universe! Jesus then puts the bible up and deflects the incoming missle Bona rolls out of Jesus' house Ok...I'm doing this! Wait, how do I stop this? Oh shit.
This mother fucker won't go down easily!
Gentaro taps the right side of his chest, and pulls out a red switch. [FIRE! FIRE ON!] Then I will take space into my hand, with my buds backing me! I won't lose to Jesus or anyone else! The Barizun sword ignites, as Gentaro charges at Jesus.
Jesus Ultimate Christ uses his Bible shield blocking Gentaros incoming attack. Sparks fly off the Bible as Jesus Ultimate Christ swings his Crossaber around to try and hit Gentaro This could have been simple. All you had to do was accept me as your lord and savior. We could have been great buds! Bona starts rolling faster through Heaven which is Danny DeVito's apartment. Ooooh shit, oh boy, oh no, this is not good.
Gentaro taps several icons on his chest. [GIANT FOOT! ICE!] Nobody should have to go that far to make buds! You haven't shown me your true face! There's no way I could be buds with anyone like that! Gentaro stomps his foot, and a frozen shoe appears above Jesus, and begins to fall.
*Gets the fuck out of here*
Jesus Ultimate Christ looks up and the shoe falls on top of him, Jesus Ultimate Christ however holds up his Bible shield pushing against the foot Y-You think this will stop the power of Christianity!? Ha! My child! You're wro- Bona rolls out of the front gates Oh boy, Im still rolling, I cannot stop. aaaaaAAAAAAA! Jesus looks at Bona What the He- The shoe crushes Jesus Ultimate Christ making a hole in Heaven which is actually Danny DeVito's apartment
Gentaro raises the lever on the sword, and it closes. You okay?
*Comes back with the halbird but called the SS.asskicker and the Kirby army armed with illegal guns parachutes down to fight Jesus*
Jesus Ultimate Christ is not ok Bona however bumps into a wall I have stopped. And the heist was successful! Good job team! We got Jesus' shoes and Gentaro even killed Jesus. We should do another heist sometime. This worked out perfectly! Bona does a Heelie flip
(edited by Bonafied-Monafied)
MY SQUEAK SQUAD IS HERE TO HELP!!! FUCK HIM UP
Yea- Wait what? Dead? He’ll come back though... right? Yeah of course he will! Gentaro kneels and lifts Jesus’s crown of thorns. He then gets rocketed back to his body, and promptly leaves the building.
Beer Mom appears completely out of nowhere and starts throwing Alcohol. BITCH WHAT ARE YOU PEOPLE DOING IN MY VACATION HOME
Bona quickly tries to heelie away Ah shit I still don't knkw how to use these! He is hit in the head by a beer bottle and falls out a window AAAAA! Bona lands on the ground, breaking all his bones. He is dead. GAME OVER!
*Shoots off an AK-47*