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lnari
PCW REVIVE: Sarinman vs Mono
Ladies and incels, welcome to PCW Revive! This show will host multiple matches across several threads featuring the best wrestlers on the Phansite. I’m your host Lnari, and we’re kicking off with two of the biggest names in the business. Introducing first, weighing in at just a few too many pounds, the madman, SARINMAN!!! points at entrance ramp
Sarinman
Yo, it's ya boi, Sarinman. I'm gonna beat Mono up and steal his key to Leblanc with ease, just watch me!
gull
finally! this is the moment i've waited for!
lnari
Entering next, weighing in at...wow...um...that’s a lot of pounds...Mono!!!
Sarinman
Sarinman walks over to Lnari and snatches the mic back. "I've got one more thing to say about Mono... He's got a smelly poo poo face." Sarinman proceeds to drop the mic and go back to the stage, giggling to himself like the child he is.
Mono
Suddenly, a giant ball is shot up onto the stage. The ball opens and Mono gets out of it. He picks up the open ball and chucks it out of the ring. "I can tell how these reviews will end up. 10/10 fight. Mono was the superior fighter." Yes, the intro is a hint at what game I'll review next. It's a golf game on the SNES. Not telling more.
(edited by Mono)
lnari
with both contestants in the ring, the crowd starts to roar Alright. Sari, Mono, prepare your minds and your bodies, because this match starts NOW! bell rings
Mono
Mono summons a bunch of records with the label "Ultima LP Legend" on them. He starts throwing them at Sarin.
Sarinman
Sorry about that, was asleep Sarinman pulls a flash drive out of his pocket and deflects the records. "You don't understand the true power of the meme drive!" He rushes Mono, tackling him to the floor before getting up and gets ready for the next attack. "The unknown power of the meme drive will get me this #1 Victory Royale!"
Mono
You underestimate the power of the games I have reviewed. Mono starts trying to suck in the Meme Drive like a great and powerful vacuum in order to use its abilities.
Sarinman
Sarinman closes the meme drive and puts it back in his pocket, and then starts to run around like a headless chicken
Mono
Mono uses the air inhaled to float up into the air. He gets some records and starts throwing them down towards Sarin.
(edited by Mono)
Sarinman
Sarin tries to do a combat roll to dodge the records, but ends up tripping and gets hit by 2 of the records. "Man those are so much harder than they seem in video games..." He picks up the records that hit him and use them as a shield to block the other records
Mono
Aw shit. Using my weapons against me. Mono goes into a ball, then shoots towards Sarin.
Sarinman
Sarin, having seen enough movies, knows exactly what to do, and dives out of the way of the ball. He attempts to get up, but trips on the mic he dropped a while ago. "Who the hell is the janitor around here?! It's been 14 fucking hours!" He picks up the mic and throws it at Mono.
Mono
Mono gets out of the ball and gets hit by the mic. Ouch... ...Sarin, you made a mistake. Mono sucks up the mic. He transforms into Mic Mono. Ladies and Gentleman, Are. You. Ready. To. ROCK!
Sarinman
"Oh no" Sarinman rummages through his pockets and finds a Rock.
Rock
"Sup bruh"
Sarinman
"Oh. I have a talking rock. Okay then." He proceeds to throw the rock at Mono.
Mono
Mono does a loud, metal, and destructive scream on the mic towards the rock GET READY TO GET ROCKED! Mic Uses Left: 2
Sarinman
"Rip rock. He had a long life. I think." He rummages through his pockets again to try to find something else. Then he finds it. The one thing that could turn this battle around. He pulls out the cardboard sign, and faces it towards Mono
Bazinga
B A Z I N G A
Mono
Mono screams the loudest thing possible towards Sarin, and the sign.
『B A Z I N G A』
Mic Uses Left: 1
(edited by Mono)
Sarinman
The cardboard box, being the very embodiment of BAZINGA, is able to capture the scream Mono caused, but it's puny frame wasn't able to, and it disintegrated. "Hmm, if that's not gonna work then maybe..."
KennyTheCrow
A Kenny The Crow statue comes out of nowhere and hugs Mono, forcing him to drink a soda that it was holding in its hand, before it runs away. Sarinman takes the distraction to throw one of the records at Mono to distract him.
Mono
The record hits Mono. Mono jumps around in pain until stopping where he was at. Hm... :B:epis. My favorite drink by :B:episco. Mono turns around and blasts one final mic blast towards Sarin.
Sarinman
Sarin gets knocked on his ass by the sound, and loses the ability to hear anything. In his confusion, he lets another of his alts out. His personal favorite of the bunch...
SHDW_Shapiro
“It is I, the Shadow Thief BEN SHAPIRO!” Ben rips his mask off, causing his Persona to form behind him. It’s a giant violin. “Stradivarius, end them!” The persona starts playing the Game of Thrones opening theme. Sarinman stands up, shaking. Ben sees this, and casts a small Dia spell before vanishing back into Sarin’s pockets
Mono
My ears! I don't like this! Mono goes into a ball.
Sarinman
Sarin gets the meme drive back out, and lets another of his alts out, which then rush Mono in his ball form, both wielding the almighty meme drive
Not-Sarinmans-Alt
The Not!Sarinman and Sarinman’s slash hits at the same time, but Not!Sarinman’s meme drive isn’t nearly as powerful as Sarinman’s, and acts the opposite way.. It ends up healing Mono for half of the damage the meme drive hit him for. Upon seeing this, Sarinman stabs his Not!Alt and puts him back in the pocket, and gets ready to go on the defensive.
Mono
Mono quickly charges towards Sarin in ball form to knock his meme drive out of his possession and suck it up.
Sarinman
Upon seeing this, Sarin lets out one of his alts and hands it his Meme Drive, then pockets it once again. Then he realizes that he can only summon his alts once. "Fuck." Then he gets hit by the ball
elmco
"and sarin has been by mono in ball form. this is quite an epic match! btw, 'sup, i'm elm and i'm the commentator who showed up halfway through the fight"
Mono
Mono continues to run into Sarin in his ball form.
Sarinman
After getting hit around for a bit, Sarin pulls out JokersSchedule and puts it in Mono's ball, but because of how tightly packed it was, it didn't immediately rip. He used the time to back off and prepare.
Mono
The Schedule breaks Mono out of the ball, making him crash into a wall. He grabs the schedule and chucks it at Sarin.
Sarinman
Sarinman pockets the Schedule and goes on the defensive
Mono
Hm... Mono pulls out a sign and protests. Memes are the DNA of the soul!
Sarinman
SarinAnn came flying out of Sarin's pocket, Meme Drive in hand. The Meme Drive absorbed the sign, and Sarinman went running to get the meme drive before Mono could get it
Mono
Mono quickly sucks up the meme drive. He becomes Meme Lord Mono!
Mono
What is a man? A miserable pile of secrets! But enough talk, have at you!
Sarinman
"ohshitohfuck" Sarinman pulls out 3 of his alts, Trapsuke, hella_Gayuji and DocBrown and makes them rush Mono one at a time while he runs like hell
Mono
Some of these memes are DEAD! A giant blast of dead memes fire towards the three alts.
(edited by Mono)
Sarinman
Sarin pulls out the entire nation of Poland and forces it to charge at Mono. "Memes are powerful and all, but he shouldn't be able to deal with this!"
Mono
Mono sends out one meme at the entire nation of Poland. https://i.imgur.com/YL4libO.png
Sarinman
"FUCK, HE JUST MASSACRED POLAND" Sarinman, knowing there is but one option left, pulls out his most powerful alt to counter the memes...
Ben_Shapiro
"L I B T A R D."
 As if a giant bomb had exploded, a shockwave is thrown out of Ben's body, hitting both Sarinman and Mono. Sarinman hits the walls hard, and struggles to stand back up
Mono
GAAAAHHHH! The shockwave knocks Mono all the way towards the wall. He very slowly gets up and shoots a stream of dead memes at Ben Shapiro.
Ben_Shapiro
Facts don't care about your feelings
 Ben reflects the memes back at Mono, dead memes and fresh ones flying around the arena in a storm of power. The two fighters are on their brink, but who will fall first?
Mono
Mono, weakly, crawls over to Ben. He blasts him with a bunch of dead memes. He moves to Sarin. He charges a shot, but then falls down. The drive and a key to Leblanc pops out of Mono. "Fine. You win. Take your key and some of your memes. I was going to give it to you anyways."
Sarinman
Sarinman pockets Ben, and takes the key and drive back, then falls down exhausted. "Very nice. Very nice. You put up a good fight. Seemed like it was pure luck that I won there. He shakes Mono's limp hand, then leaves the arena
Mono
Mono gets up and grabs his notebook. He starts writing a review. "9/10 fight. Outcome was good. FIghting was fantastic. Only missing more memes." Mono closes the notebook up, and leaves the arena.
lnari
What a match ladies and incels! After a hard-fought battle with many memes, and even more run-ins, the winner of this match is...Sarinman!!! With his new key to LeBlanc, there’s no telling where he’ll go from here. All I know for sure is that we’ve just witnesssed a fantastic opener to our card here on PCW REVIVE! Tune in next time, because we have a big surprise for you all!
elmco
"woohoo"