Welcome to Phansite archive (beta)
You'll find here all archived threads from the Phansite forum.
Kitagawa
Mmm I'm at my job
Who wants to see me pour a coffee down my pants?
-TheAkiraKurusu-
mee
Futaba_Sakura
Will it be a hot one? Or one of these silly ice coffees?
Kitagawa
Very well, I currently am holding a jug of coffee. It is fresh and incredibly hot, and I will now proceed to pour it down my pants.
glacier
Spill some on the Sayuri
Kitagawa
I am sure some will splash on the Sayuri once I begin to writhe in pain from the coffee scalding my tender flesh.
imtherealklib
Sublime
Kitagawa
My flesh is currently burning. The pain is indescribable. I am watching as the scalding coffee melts my skin.
Inari
@Kitagawa

I am thou, thou art I.
Thou must pour thine hot beverage down thine lower body clothing article
glacier
Just like Goemon
Kitagawa
My melted flesh is beginning to cool once more and is fusing with the floor. The skin that hasn't melted is red and covered in bleeding blisters. I will never be able to leave this spot.
Junnosuke_Kitagawa
Son!
Futaba_Sakura
God.. This is making me feel really sick. Why did I ever leave my room? :(
Kitagawa
I will most likely gain an infection and die. This is my end. My death began by pouring hot coffee down my pants and on my genitals.
Inari
delet
Kitagawa
My life will be delete. My end is near. I will either succumb to an infection or starve to death.
Futaba_Sakura
Pls Stahp @Kitagawa :(
Junnosuke_Kitagawa
You're a disgrace to your family
glacier
Kitawagone
Inari
rip
Kitagawa
Someone please get a giant spatula and scrape me off the floor and also get me to a hospital.
Inari
How hot was the coffee?
glacier
@Kitagawa, mind pouring me a cup? Stop being lazy just get up
Kitagawa
@glacier

I am not lazy my flesh is literally fused with the floor I can not get up without tearing away large portions of my skin.
Futaba_Sakura
Okay I just vomited.. Alot.. Why do I keep coming back here..
Kitagawa
Also the coffee was good.
Kitagawa
Stay out of this heck it's not for babbies.
Kitagawa
I write fanfictions I can type things in great detail and even moreso that what is written here but alas I am truly at work and typing on mobile is a pain.
glacier
I'll buy you new flesh I promise
Inari
@glacier how does that work
Boss
Black market
Inari
huh
Boss
You can just buy it on the black market
Kitagawa
Okay I will get up and get the coffee.
glacier
Kitagawa, my prince
Kitagawa
Worry not as well, I do not cum in my coffee. It will be fresh and pure coffee.
Boss
@glacier

BACK OFF HES MINE
pixie
How do you keep doing this at work without anyone noticing
Kitagawa
@Boss

Don't worry, I am merely serving her come coffee. My heart still belongs to you now that -AkiraKurusu-'s rejection has finally set in for me.
Kitagawa
@pixie

I think the real question is how do I keep doing this and am still able to work the next day considering how devastating my injuries are.
glacier
@Boss I DON'T THINK SO BOSS
Boss
@glacier

FIGHT ME FGT

BRING OUT YOUR [STANDO]
glacier
@Boss I'M GAY
Kitagawa
So uh- do you both desire some coffee..? I assure you there is plenty for everyone.
glacier
Yes please, cream and sugar babe
Boss
@Kitagawa

Poison it
Kitagawa
Boss... this is unlike you. I must ask that you calm down, you serve coffee to others much more frequently and you never see me acting as such.

I shall get your proper order at once though- absolutely no poison I promise. I only seek harm to myself using coffee after all.
glacier
@Boss what the fuck
Boss
-AHEM-

Apologies...rivalries are...touchy for me...
glacier
It's okay, I still love you both just the same
Kitagawa
So would you prefer if I do not serve the coffee and instead pour it on myself again?
glacier
It seems that would please us both
Boss
OOC: Seriously though...what...in God's name goes through your head to ask "should I put coffee on my dick?" To a bunch of anons. I envy you, and I am puzzled by you @Kitagawa
Boss
Also

Coffee Trapsuke
glacier
OOC: The idea of Yusuke repeatedly pouring coffee on himself just cracks me up for some reason.
Kitagawa
Very well, I will now proceed. to pour even more coffee down my pants.
Kitagawa
OOC: My thought process is something that is hotly debated, but never truly understood. We may never know why I coffee my genitals.
Boss
"Akira I got a job"
"Cool yusuke"
"I pured coffee on my crotch"
"What"
Kitagawa
It's like the advanced form of the jizz coffee. Cumming in the coffee is one thing, actually putting your dick in it is another.
Kitagawa
Not to mention nobody has to actually drink the dick coffee, it is merely used to melt the flesh off of my penis.
Boss
This is a really weird circumcision
Kitagawa
It's actually the best way to do it I swear it is scientifically proven.
Boss
Besides the minor 2nd degree burns
Kitagawa
It's worth it.
Phantom_Trickster
Surely someone's going to hear you scream the mother of all screams.
pixie
🔰
Kitagawa
I am so used to the pain I do not scream I simply sit there and take it.