@Boss and I have an entire google doc of stupid quotes that our friends have said.

I cannot draw a face.
Is the mind not able to comprehend the detail of a face,
Or have I only seen masks?

-HahaRIP, summoner of old gods, destroyer of forums

@HahaRIP dude, that's kinda edgy ngl.

@Shiza_Salad

Are any of my quotes there or am I too fresh of a friend?

@Dwerraven
Yes I'm problem.
Got an edge?

These chocolate chip pancakes actually kinda suck.

@Kitagawa we'll share it with you if you want. I haven't edited it with yours yet.

*My friends looking at one of them who has big boobies*
*Talking about them*
Me not know what they were talking about and looking out the window: "Wow what a great view, there is even a penny down there."

My friends burtsting out in laughter because they thought, I was talking about her tits.XD

@HahaRIP no edge, man. Sorry i won't problem you.

@Boss

I have no idea how google docs works all I know is I am an extremely quotable person.

"I would land you life in prison for serial murder and rape, but you helped me cheat on the midterm"
"No, you cannot fuck the crow boy "
"Batman v Superman is as bad as hitler being gay for Stalin"
"I FUCKED YOUR BOYFRIEND"
"Motherfucker, this man has wings!"

"If this doesn't involve me in any way, then don't tell me"
"Don't care"
"Can I get a McFaggot"
"Remind me never to speak to again"
"Go bother someone else, I'm not in the mood today"
"Quit your bitching"

Only at school I say this to my friends

more from the doc:

"Trying to fight death is like pitting a cancer patient against Mike Tyson"
“Gay orgies are like Jenga”
“Gravity makes me rock-solid.”
“Your asshole is nothing like rocks with teeth”
“Not just a regular accordion, a fucking accordion. It's got a hole, or maybe something long and hard on the end. Or both, I don't judge. Also, whenever you play it, it squelches.”

@Boss

What about my quotes that are lengthy and well-worded and you think I am telling a serious tale and then it just ends with me saying I want some dick or something.

@Kitagawa
If you remember them, put them in

@Boss

I do not even remember what I had for breakfast.

Well shit. At least we have the page now

"How are you going to enforce that rule if you are never here?"

"I'm just gonna do as I always do- spout memes, eat pizza and ramen, play video games, and watch hentai. All to drown out crippling depression."

"Look, some things in life are unexpected, like the Spanish Inquisition. But me being a failure? That's as expected as me wanting to fuck a dragon girl. Blatantly obvious once you get to know me."

-ALL OF THESE ARE ME

No bust, no biggie.

I dont remember any quotes right now (bad memory) but I know I have an ability to create words (in spanish obviusly).
I dont know why, but it just happens randomly XD

@Liam I AM SO GLAD YOU PUT THAT THERE.

Big money, big pants.
A friend and I had come up with that during a game of jeopardy in class to shout whenever we knew the answer, so nobody overheard us.

here, have some more:

“It tastes like if jesus’ cum was caffeinated.”
“I can't walk two feet without getting hit on by men!”
“Babies’ skin is so soft because they’ve been marinating for nine months.”

"Shut up, Hannibal! Go back to Disney world with your ass!"
"Keep calm, drink milk, and wing it!"
And many more...sadly, I got nothing else. Most of it is just when it's​ Saturday.

"ip"

"I'll give you the benefit of the dumb."

@Starwaddle
I remember one of em' that one was perfect for the situation.

"See, i'm not useless sometimes"
"woof"
those are pretty much my catchphrases.

"What if chickens were in the place of humans, and humans were in the place of chickens? What would mcnuggets be made of??"
"on a scale of 4-9 how high are you?"
"I jokingly googled meme porn and now i'm scared"
"Is it a boy/girl thing?"
"i have a dick and you don't"
"will my boobs cheer you up?"
"i killed my friend's boyfriend's boner with jesus"
"I'm buying me some leather so i can be everybody's leather daddy"

All things I've said to my friends while sober.

Bluey built this city and now, like George Washington, he's left it to us to take care of for the next 220 years until we elect Shido Prime Minister."

- Me, on Discord, while discussing Phansite lore.

"Have I said Goro is a pancake?"
"Morgana is smol and he makes wind"
"Questionable shopping is the best shopping."
"I should make Isis soon"
This is all when I was bored at some time in a week.

"If you are lucky I will allow you to suckle a condiment of your choice from the tip of my finger."

Don't have one yet