Welcome to Phansite archive (beta)
You'll find here all archived threads from the Phansite forum.
Moonlight Cafe II: Attack of the Robowaifus
We have muffins, sandwiches, and bagels now.
I like a Parmesan bagel please.

*drops 200 blood echos on the counter*
Ummm... You got it...
*peeks into the door*
There aren't any angry robots around this cafe, are there?
Ah, at last. I've been meaning to visit here as just a customer for days now.

Hey Bluey. Got any banana cinnamon muffins?
@Bgammax
Don't worry; it's just a title my narrator came up with.

@Migrant
Coming right up.
*sips latte steadily*

I do love this place.
Ok
*walks in the door*
I'm not really familiar with these places, is there something you'd suggest?
Uh-huh. Here's the problem: too many toasters! You know what they say, "All toasters toast muffins, sandwiches, and bagels now!"
*looks around*

This cafe appears to be relatively calm.

May I have a chocolate muffin?
@Bgammax
The coffee of course.

@Mario
You ain't touching my toasters.

@DemonicHomura
Sure.
This place seems not exploded. Don't mind if I do. *Takes a seat*
I found another cafe, oh yay. I'll take a blueberry muffin.
Alright then Bluey, I'll take a coffee.
*Sits downs on the nearest seat*

As long as things don't get crazy again i'm good.
(Oh boy... I might get overwhelmed)

*He brings Hunter his bagel, Migrant his muffin, and Homuea her muffin*
*Walks in*

They eventually get crazy one way or another...
Are pets allowed? Asking for a friend
*Starts picking at her muffin*

If I have to help kidnap another person it will be too soon.
I'll take some coffee. Bla-no, cream and sugar. I feel like treating myself today.
@Bgammax
You got it. Gimme a sec.
*he gives Kuroumi a blueberry muffin*

@Starwaddle
Can I take your order?
Hey, as long as Nana isn't here, things will be pretty peaceful!
*looks around at the crowd*
There are so many cool people here.
I hope nothing happens this time...
I am just here to chill out @Bgammax.
*notices Hunter*
oh, hey blood man. How did the streets go?
It's not usually this busy.
*He give Gamma his cup of coffee.*

Can I take your order Kaz?
@Kazuya

Nana was the crazy person who tried to kill Lightning right?

Is she always like that?
Thanks Bluey. You know, this is a nice place you got here.
Who want to bet on the destruction of this place. 2000 yen on a few good holes.
So there are survivors from what happened at LeBlanc.
*Noms on muffin*
15% of my soul was burned that time.
Wait, what happened at LeBlanc?
Greetings @-LightningFarron-. Been a while.
Well...apparently only if it involves me, Homu-chan.

*Turns to Yuki*

I dunno man, surprise me! I trust you!
Also, my friend still needs to know if pets are allowed
Yeah, what did happen? I kinda spaced out at the time.
I was only there for the start of the madness at LeBlanc. Not sure what happened. Know something blew up.
DID SOMEONE SAY ROBOWAIFUS
Cause I totally am one.
Well Kitty, first there were these bombs, then an angry robot attacked me, so now I'm kinda scared to go back there.
*immediately attempts to drink the coffee only to burn himself*
Ow, this stuff's hot.
@Kazuya
You got it.

*He gives Starwaddle their coffee*
Aigis, I think I might need help.
Oh hi Aigis. Did someone say robowaifus? I didn't say robowaifus.
Thanks. *takes a sip* this is some good stuff.
People also got really drunk in Leblanc last night.

I heard that a bunch of weird stuff occurred since Labrys left the alcohol out.
Oh yeah, I think I remember something about that. Booze came out, and everything went to shit.
So how's Aigis @bluehairedemo... heard that she got a "upgrades"
*nods to @The_Hunter*

Hello friend. Howbare you?
I only remember Nanaka doing weird crap to Kaz at the start. I left for a few minutes, came back, then left again right after things got worse.
Right, just tell me what you need!
Did some beast hunting at Yharnam and give Kotone a gift... though I did die from blood loss while demonstrating it.
*He brings Kaz a latte*

@The_Hunter
Y-Yeah...
*looks at Hunter*
you're looking pretty good for a dead guy, blood man.
*He smiles at him as he takes the latte and takes a sip*

Not bad Bluey, not bad at all!
Yeah...that was fun...sorry about the death, but hey, it happens.
He got the katana back after dying anyways.
@bluehairedemo
Yeah I heard that while drinking my tea.

@Bgammax
I did die five thousand six hundred and eighty times. But I still look a day young.
*finishes up the muffin*

The food here is of good quality.
*continues looking at Hunter, confused*
so you're saying... No matter how much you die.. You still get a body?
*Warps in*
Hey guys...
@The_Hunter
R-Right... you were at LaBlanc.

@DemonicHomura
*He nods* Made them myself.
@Bgammax
Same for me. I'm supposed to be the last of my kind, but I still get a body after being pummeled.
@Bgammax
Yup. I am an ascended human Great One. So having the power to respawn get's its perks.
Akamoto! What can I get ya?
@bluehairedemo
I guess choosing a better street was a good idea after all.
*now looking between Kuroumi and Hunter*
That's AWESOME... I'm afraid I only get one try with this...
*looks dejected*
Yup Bluey, I was in LeBlanc.
I'm a multiversal God. Respawning is kinda natural for me.
Yo, Shinji!
Tea please, something relaxing, I need it.
Hey Kaz.
Did something happen to you...?
@Bgammax

Dying is a fun afternoon activity.

You should try it sometime.
You got it.

@RobowaifuAigis
Yeah definitely.

@The_Hunter
So... you heard it all?
I'll prove it @Bgammax that I have a dead body of me.

*rings a Beckoning Bell and brings a pale corpse of himself*

See and it doesn't smell so it's a plus.
Nah, Just the usual panicking.
@DemonicHomura

... I was told I wouldn't get this back if I died..
I don't wanna risk it.
*turning to Hunter*
Blood Man, I never doubted you.. I just wish I had so many spares lying around.
So? Just have someone give you a revival item after you did. Simple.
@bluehairedemo
Yeah, I was walking to LeBlanc to grab a bite to eat and a cup of tea to sip until I heard it.

*grabs his bagel and eats it*
@Bgammax
The reviving is nice and all, but the dying and then getting gold stolen isn't.
*He places a hand on his shoulder*

Relax man, it'll be fine.
@The_Hunter
This is uh.... awkward....
And the name is Vicktores @Bgammax. I just tend to forget it.
Bean me please captain.
Yea sorry,
*checks phone*

Still nothing...
@RobowaifuAigis
You got it.
@Starwaddle
I dunno glasses lady, if that worked this probably still wouldn't come back to me..

@Kuromi
I haven't tried dying yet so I'll trust you on it. But its got to be a lot better than just losing a body.

@Hunter
Victor? Ok, I think I can go with that, Victor.
nahh @bluehairedemo... i've been through so many awkward situation I've been callous to it.

*takes a swig from a blood vial*
@The_Hunter
Heh... well it's not every day you hear something like this...

*He brings Akamoto his tea*
*sips coffee* So...anyone have any embarrassing stories from before they showed up in the Nexus?
I've pretty much always been here glasses lady, so I don't have much on that...
One time I accidentally fucked up a timeline and got all my friends killed.

*Starts to laugh*

Looking back at it now it's hilarious.
Oh right, didn't introduce myself. My name is Star, former multiversal God that did whatever she wanted, now stuck doing diplomatic work for other multiversal gods because if I don't then they will kill me.
...another God..?
Star? Like the things in the Sky? I can do that. Nice to see you Miss Star.
Well, technically a goddess, but you get the idea.
And it's nice to meet you as well.
@bluehairedemo
So yeah...

@Bgammax
Do you know about this Celestia Ludenberg that I've been talking about yesterday?
@RobowaifuAigis
*He brings her the usual cup of coffee*
@The_Hunter
Celestia who? I'm not that good at names Victor, haven't worried about it much...
@The_Hunter
You have poor memory, must because of all the dying.
@bluehairedemo
Thank you sweetheart.
*sips it*
I demand fifteen of your finest 🅱️agels and a full pot of black house blend
This place is starting to attract deities... I'm starting to feel like I'm in over my head trying to protect it.
@NotIgor
.... Am.... Am I high?
*Takes tea*
Thanks man.
You heard me
Nope, not high... I see it too....

A bear impersonating a man with a long nose.
@Migrant
I'm just a normal Demon Slayer, but a unique one for being born from a light crystal.
I never claimed to be igor
@Bgammax
Ludenberg, and I do remember that she was wearing in black like me and having crimson eyes and her skin was pale like me.
@Migrant
S... Should I ignore them?
Holy Pantheon what is that thing.
Eh, I used to be all powerful, but when you get fucked over by 100 gods all at the same time...well, let's just say that me coming here is a fucking blessing. Honestly, if I'm lucky I might be in another multiverse!
Does it have money? Don't turn down money, unless it wants alcohol. Always turn down alcohol. I learned that at Leblanc last night.
@The_Hunter
I don't really know much of anyone here... I only saw my family until recently, and none of them look like that.
Sorry.
@NotIgor meh. I've seen weirder.
I've seen 🅱️epis
@NotIgor
A-Ahem! You do understand that will cost quite a bit right?
I think I should Grim Scythe it. Should I?
Actually, Star, I'd say rather than a different Multiverse, the Nexus is a Subspace between Multiverses
I have ten bags full of Japanese yen and one usd dollar
@Bgammax
Okay but thanks. But she did told me that she owned a casino...? Don't know what that is.
Yes there A-wait what? Someone actually knows that there is more than one multiverse? Wow, that saves me some time!
You do accept yen correct?
@Hunter
I've never heard of those either Victor, I only discovered these Cafe places a yesterday.
I think we also kinda overlapped with the collective unconsciousness here. Since we can summon our Personas.

*blinks at NotIgor*

Um.... where'd you find exactly one dollar?
@NotIgor
Y-Yes. Coming right up...
On a dead body
It's called an ATM.
... What?
Or it was sleeping I can't remember
@Bgammax
Alright well good night everyone and Bluey nice baking.

*drops a silver coin for a tip and leaves*
It was actually on the ground
Persona? Ah, right, I remember now...learned so much that I forgot I even had one.
Oh yeah, forgot I had a Persona too Star. Been relying too much on Demon Skills.
Does being able to summon gods count as a persona?
If I remember correctly mine is my own Shadow...heh, a shadow persona seems so weird when you think about it, but it also makes sense in a way.
@NotIgor I am a god, and I can summon my own Shadow so...yeah, it counts.
But I mean multiple gods
... Ok. I'm not serving it on a body.
*starts humming softly*
No the dollar was on the body
*leans over toward Yuki*

Who are these people...?
Person....
Do you mean this thing?
*summons a small green flame*
apparently his name's Wisp.
So? There are people that use multiple persona. Hell, I can use multiple persona, but I choose not to because if I did then all hell would break loose...
I don't summon gods though! They get clingy...
@Bgammax yep, that's a persona.
@Bgammax
What is that? Looks like a fireball shot from a Blaze Wizard gone wrong.
*checks phone*

nope.
@Migrant
No idea, but the long nose guy might be trouble.
This is profiling
@Aishiomi
I dunno, it came with this. But it can do some cool things...
I probably shouldn't do any of it here though.
They might get mad at me.
This is...lookscism!
@Bgammax
"They"....?
@Kuroumi
Well.... Truth is I snuck out here.. My family might notice if I did anything, and they probably wouldn't be happy with me.
@Bgammax
Interesting. Not my problem, but you make good decisions.
@Bgammax so? The place is probably going to have a few good sized holes in it. Go nuts.
@Starwaddle
What makes you think that?
@Bgammax not before I get my coffee and bagels!!
I was there during LeBlanc. It sounded like it was a regular occurrence.
@Starwaddle
Not a good idea... If my family found out I was here...
Well, they were livid last time I did something.. I don't want to make them mad again.
Anyone blows this place up, and it's a one way trip to Megidolaon city.
I was one of the ones that didn't get drunk.
Honestly I wouldn't stop Aigis from ripping you apart if you blew this place up. *looks straight at Gamma*
Me as well.
*finally notice Migrant*
oh, angry guy... I.. I should go, shouldn't I?
*to stars comment
@RobowaifuAigis not me, I'm just here to watch. You know what? *Plops a large sack of yen on the counter* in case anything happens. My job may suck, but the pay is great.
Cmon Mig, don't be so hostile to the guy.
Stop being so aggressive! I feel like it's interrupting my bagel time!
About how much is a goddess paid?
I'm not being hostile. I'm just being non-interventionist.

If you want hostile, though, someone could fetch Lux.
..... We've become the new LeBlanc...
Are my bagels ready yet???
I hope not Bluey...
LeBlanc has angry robots..
Angry robots that hate me.
About a million yen an hour. And that's just on a bad day. Usually it's three million.
@Bgammax
I'm not angry and don't hate you yet
So you're good.
@RobowaifuAigis
Thanks, you seem like a nice lady. I think I'll call you nice robot, and the other one angry robot.
Wow, you guys are paid crap...
I'm paid in 99 healing potions. Not sure why.
I pay myself!
Well, I did get fucked over by 100 gods. I used to be one of the greatest gods out there, but then my ass became grass and now I get to do diplomatic work. I'm just lucky I get paid at all.
I only killed about 20 Stone Faced Monsters and 30 Living Mushrooms. And a cursed tree. I get 99 potions outta that, and also killing living stuffed toys.
True, I guess that you would have gotten a pay drop...

Do you know Illya?
I do absolutely nothing to finance myself
*A strange women is seen sitting in the corner of the cafe drinking a strange tea, your certain she wasn't there before*
Illya? No, I don't think I do. I do remember meeting a metal Cocoanut God once, but not an Illya.
Can I have my bagels yet? I ordered an hour ago
Hmm, Ok, Maybe you're from another multiverse then.

*looks to corner*

Another Deity? The Nexus's pull is getting stronger.
Who're you?
Oh god... Look if you're a god don't cause any trouble.
I'm simply a women enjoying some tea, there is nothing more here.
I'll pull out a Grim Scythe if needed on this Deity.
*notices Izanami*
when'd pretty lady get there? I was watching the door...
Tea? Yuki, did you get her any tea...?
You all seem to be confused. How sad that you can't just be happy being lost in the fog.
Trust me, I've been to many places, met many faces, and shot many faces...more than 200,000 of which were mine...never picking up a Uzi again.
I don't like being lost.
I don't like not having bagels
*checks phone*

You stink of power lady, Either you're a deity, or a wildcard user.
I don't like not having these glasses on right now.
See, the problem is we'd have to be lost. Can't I be /found/ in the fog?
Isn't it better to just simply live in a fantasy where everyone is at peace than have to live in a reality where everyone you hold dear suffers?
I'll pull some Demon Slayer skills if I need to. Just tell when I should.
*suddenly defensive*
I've been in a fog for a long time pretty lady...
I'm not keen on the idea of going back
She's spoutin' philosophical crap, she ain't a wildcard guys.
So she's a deity.
I live both of those at the same time... it's how I became a god in the first place.
Fear me not, children of man. I only wish to grant the wishes of humanity and bring them the gift which they so desperately desire.
@Izanami-no-Okami
Ok lady, cool it before I megidolaon you to hell.
Humanity don't want anyone to grant their wishes lady...
If you grant wishes then why do I remain bagelless
Does that wish include a life time supply of hot chocolate?
Living in a happy fantasy might sound great...

But someone has to keep that happy fantasy, or it'll be destroyed by outside forces.

That's why we're here.
*walks towards the door*
I shouldn't be in this place if it gets dangerous....
Don't want them to catch me in a fight..
You can all have anything you desire in the new world I'm going to create.
New World....?
Ye-wait what? Oh no you don't! I know where this is going! I've played my fair share of videogames​ to know that your ass will be grass if you do something!
@Izanami-no-Okami
You're pushing it lady.
I just want 15 goddamn bagels is that too much to ask?
You shall all soon see just how pointless the "truth" is...
*The mysterious woman fades away in a cloud of fog*
So...who wants to call Yu? Truth is his thing if I remember.
Something tells me Yu and that lady have a history.
49 20 6d 61 20 65 67 69 72 74 6e 75 72 6e 20 64 6e 61 20 70 72 70 65 61 72 65 20 6f 74 20 67 68 74 69 66 2e 2e 2e
OOC: keep it on its own thing Storm, already figured it there
Well that was strange...
She said some deep things while existent.
Is this normal? Yesterday there were angry robots, now there're people speaking gibberish...
I'm confused what she was implying.... "Fog" and "Truth."
.... I don't like Fog.. Its cold and empty... This is much better.
That's all well and good but I have below optimal levels of bagel
That was Izanagi... something...she's...a goddess of something... can't exactly remember all the details. It's been a while since I've heard anything about her. Probably got the name wrong, but point is I know a few things.
I praise... Izanami... no truth... no pain...
No Truth, No Pain?
But no pain no gain, so...you lose less with the truth.
True.
Darkness is falling...
F̹̲͘r̷͚̟̹é̙̠e̷d̰͈̥̯o̷m͚̠ͅ ̪͙̖̰͉̱ͅi̫̭s͖̦̠͖ ̣͙̪̼̗n̜͍͉̠̼ͅo̬̤͇̭͚͎͞ ̧̻͈͖͓̣̣t͓͚̠͈r̳̘̰̮̥̥͔ų̲̲͚t̪ͅḩ.̳̝̤͇̭͇̭͘.̢̪̹̦̯̹̟.̫͚͚͔̦ ̝̞̠͜ͅt͕̙͟r͓̣͇̩͓̗̖u̵̮͔͉̦͖͓̘t͉̤̜͉͕h̭̯̹ ̨͔̰͙b̶̰͉̙̫̭̜̙ṛ̹i̞̖n̘̺̜͙g̤̕s̛̜̹ ͉̳̯̻̹p̨ą͍̬̘͖̠̬i̵̟͔̼̙̲ͅͅn̞͚.͖..̦͝ ̻͚̝̰̫̺͡p̮͖̝̤a͙̱̤̼͈̫i̴̟͓n̥̟͓͉͝ͅ ̭ḿ̥̟e̪̱̙̻͍̻̳͘a̛̬n̻̮̝͈̘͇̮͞i̸̼͖n̜g̺̠̘͜l͚͇͓̥ͅe̻̬̭s͜s̰̀ ͈͕̼̼t͕̭̠̝ǫ̝̹̻ ͖̮͇n̩͙̩͝o͔͝ ͚̞͕͓̤̀t͖̱̮̗̥r͙ư̠̲̠̥͓̝͕t̶h͕̮̩̜̱̼.͔̭̗͚ͅͅ
̟̹̣͓͈̜͕
R̲̱̗̟̲e͏s͔͍̱̫̗̩͠c̞͖̟̜̥i̻͟ͅnd͕̰͈͉ ̟͈͈y̝ò͖̙̦̝̻u̷͕̳͙͓͚̰ṛ̡͉̠͓͈ ̯̰̘̙͝t͓͘r̖̦͔̪̫̺͖ú̠̰̟̯̤t̰̦͓̦̼h̛̠͈̹.̟̭͎̻ ͉̤ͅF͈̩͖̰͎̱̖r̀e̷̖͍e̴͔͔̬d̟̥̳̤̯o͎̞̭͓͠m̠ ̳i͠s̻͚̖̫ ̼̻̼̳͉̠n͔̪͉̪̟o̞ ̨t͔̬̲͓͙͞r̺̪̝̥͚̙ͅu҉t̟̞̘͍h̸̘
Boi I'm about to blow you away if you don't stop that.
OOC: Legit, this is one of the calm hangout threads, do it on the one you made
MEGIDOLAON
You're making trouble. I won't stop Aigis from tearing you apart if you continue making trouble.
Shut up, Hannibal! Go back to Disney world with your ass!
*Enters the cafe*
Click to load png image (size - 117 kb)

Mmm...I like the smell of muffins.
OOC: TIMING!!!

-----------------

Oh, hey Lavenza. Haven't seen you in ages.
*summons Shadow-sona* Megidolaon!
...I just came in for a cup of midnight tea.
How ya doin Lavenza?
@bluehairedemo
Click to load png image (size - 117 kb)

Daddy, how much for a muffin?
Hey everyone what's up?
Lavenza is a muffin
Eh, the usual. Weird soldier shadows talking about killing us all. Goddesses drinking tea and talking about the fog.
sup yall.
*checks phone*

nope

*sips tea
@Tatsuya
oh, hey nice guy. I didn't get to thank you for yesterday. Thanks for helping me get out peacefully.
@Migrant, @Kuroumi
Click to load png image (size - 117 kb)

Oh hello! I'm doing fine, Kuroumi-san! Thank you for asking! ❤️
Envy I wasn't helping you. I just don't want the innocent being dragged in. So long as you harm no one here I won't fight you here. Got it?
@IamThou
Hm? Sorry sweetie, I've been distracted lately. It's only 300Â¥
@-Akira_Kurusu-
Click to load png image (size - 117 kb)
I thought I was a cinnamon roll?
@Migrant
I thrive in the fog... I won't waver.

@Tatsuya
Let's bear this madness together, Tatsuya-kun.
*sips coffee* that, and my introduction. The name's Star, former multiversal goddess, now diplomat for 100. Nice to meet you all.
OOC: Hey what Arcana is Sayaka? I wanna give Tatsuya a social link for her.
@Tatsuya
I thought you were nice... I can't hurt people right now, or they'd get mad at me again.
@bluehairedemo
Click to load png image (size - 117 kb)

I'll have one, please.
*Gives Yuki ¥300*
I'm nice to those who don't threaten anyone. If you aren't trying to hurt people at all I'll be nice to you.
@Tatsuya
OOC: Jester.
I only hurt people when I'm insane. That fine?
I don't know why you people act so rude to me, I haven't done much of anything, except erase some bombs yesteday.
@IamThou
*He smiles and hands her a muffin* Here you go.
.... Hey... there's something I need to tell you.
@bluehairedemo I'll take some more coffee, and five cinnamon rolls. Just deduct it from the bag.
Oh you're cinnamon roll then
Have I been rude?
Don't go insane and sure. And yeah Sayaka we're friends so of course I'll help. *He grins at her* "Thou hast established the Sayaka Adachi social link of the Jester arcana." Jester? Never heard of that one.
@bluehairedemo I am still in dire need of those bagels
Tea with 3 Sugars, Bluey.
I'm not trying to be rude envy. It's just all the other sins have been murderous so I'm a little wary. You understand right?
(Oi! Let the man talk with his daughter for a moment)
@bluehairedemo
Click to load png image (size - 117 kb)
*Takes the muffin*
Thank you, father! Oh and what is it?
@Tatsuya
My siblings? No, Narcy wouldn't hurt anyone... He was always so nice to me, although he did spend most of the time talking about himself... Some of the others scare me though..
@Tatsuya
Was I ever sane...? Wait, did you just say something?
@Tatsuya
I never go insane unless I'm in need of magic.
I did yes. I've been getting those Social Links Bluey and Yu have. Your Jester arcana. *He chuckles* Guess ya won't be rid of me now.
@Tatsuya I'm always insane. Hell, I got a palace, and have saved lives with it. If isn't insane, then I don't know what is.
*Checks phone*
Hmm

Hi tatsuya.
@IamThou
Well.... You're going to have a sibling... that's the right word for this right?
Hey Shinji. Also just nobody kill anyone okay? Beyond that what ever I'm not fighting here unless I have to.
Smashing?
@bluehairedemo
Click to load png image (size - 117 kb)
Mom's....PREGNANT?!

*A huge smiles stretches across her face*

*Paralyzed from happiness*
I paid for any damages that may happen. If there's anyone you would fight, it's not me.
WHAT THE FUCK????????? SOMEBODY SMASHED WITHOUT ME????????!!!!!!!!!!!
*notices IamThou*
Is bow-chick ok? She looks hurt...
@IamThou
... Lavenza? Sweetie?
I am I allowed to threaten people? I just like saying "Grim Scythe."
Smile*

Wow did my finger slip or something?
That's what normal people do, Akira.
I'd rather you don't. But yeah sure thing lady just don't actually hurt anyone... Also were you trying to threaten me I just can't tell with most people unless I'm actively fighting for my life.
It's a JOKE
@IamThou DAH!? *Falls off chair, dies, comes back three seconds after with the body suddenly gone* geez, that hurt. Well, congratulations.
@Tatsuya
No. I'd never threaten someone unless others are fine with it.
(Yo splash some water at Lavenza's face it would probably wake her up or something)
.... does that normally happen when people die Star?
@Tatsuya
Oh. That's right, my Persona. Izanami said something about bearing my brothers sins when I got my Persona... I got a tarot card that day, but it's not like any card from any deck I have seen... And I wasn't looking to get rid of you in the first place, idiot. *Smirks*
*runs outside and grabs a hose then runs back in with the hose and sprays it in Lavenza's face*